heh... work completely brought me down today... it was so fucking hot and in the first few hours of my shift there were like zero people. So i had no choice but to stand under the worthless umbrella and try to keep my sanity. I was so bored dat i smsed around... only a few replied.. but nvm thx a lot okay. One weird thing dat happen though was the heat made me hallucinate... yeah hallucinate!!!!. I remembered seeing people in the queue line and getting into the ride. Then i remember starting the ride but when the rided ended. there was nobody there... had i seen ghosts...?? blergh.. stupid escape. But if something good dat did happen was i made new friends. This new guy taufiq. So easy to get along with man. We both combined to diss Dhaifullah. That fucking psycho maniac hahaha. And he even recommended me some hot 'chicks' that took his ride. so yeah this type of guy can really make good friends.

hahaha. so after work my original plan was to go to the beach and meet the kids there. they after all suggested going to the beach yesterday but then they had already went earlier in the morning and were all on the rails by the time i had left work. yeah so dissapointed. had been looking forward to go the beach and like liza said "nak tgk stars".. hehe so nvm then met yazid in the bus den zack, allen,din and dan at the rails. wat rail?? (go look at my header pic yeah?? haha). den zack and yazid left to donno where. allen accompanied me to kfc and din and dan went off to cut their hair. i tink? haha anyways.... went home after dat... so tired...


this pic is fucking awesome. my plain sunset shirt blended with the background. the trees thing if u dunno wat i mean heh heh

and fuck yeah leeds should have won against liverpool. wat a match. tak sia sia aku support leeds. i remembered the match dat made me decide to turn my back on man u. it was a few years ago when leeds beat lazio 1-0 in the champions league. the passion and skill that the played dat match in really turned me into a fan. unfortunately now though they are really struggling.. hope they do survive.. heh..

ish my star lagu merepek ar!!!

was surfing around and found dat i had several pictures in my shutterfly a/c.. so i decided to post them up.. and since i'm kinda bored i shall go scan some more pics of asthenia and the ps gig dat i went to... will be up in due time...

hey thx zad for totally making yesterday night's emo session enjoyable. really cracked me up with ur jokes. heh perfect medicine for wat i was feeling.

in the morning i had to be on duty for the ite open house. and heck instead of looking after our stall i went around with clarence, ban shin, and ray and played some games. won a couple of nice prizes. 3 glass candles, an alarm clock a notebook, a spiderman eraser and a dozen pens. so i guess i did pretty well. haha. so after the open house had ended i went off and met din allen and zack. they wanted to go apply at republic poly. so i tagged along. saw the campus and i tot i was in some old abandoned hospital or something. urh... och.... so they did wat they had to do and den we proceeded to the nearby mosque and did our afternoon prayers.something i have not done for a long time. blergh wat is becoming of me...

made our way to far east plaza after dat. Had our lunch and i bought a cap. leaving me with 15 bucks in my wallet and i actually started the day of with 26. urh must learn to save money. pay day in a weeks time. would only be getting 100 plus bucks. so pathetic. argh frust man....

sometimes chatting has become too much of a whine man. need more funnier people online. need smiles. need laughter at 3 am in the morning. need a feel good feeling. argh!!!

shall go friendster now.

u know earlier in the day.. the kids were laughing about how they fared in their o's and generally taking it all in a relaxed manner. But it all began to sink in when we were in the bus on the way home. what the fuck are we doing with our life. What The fuck am i doing with my life. I have no direction. No idea of what i wanna be. when i was in primary school and the teacher would ask us wat our ambitions are and what do we wanna be when we grow up. I would be like the only one in class who would think of sumthing just for the sake of giving an answer.
people chase dreams.
i daydream. thats all i ever do.

but all in all i accept that maybe ite isnt so bad after all. maybe god has already given me this path. so i should shut the fuck up and live with it. yipeeee. bt the thing about ite is. its just so fucking relaxed that the enviroment there doesn't promote studying at all. wat with the fucked up lecturers who cant even speak english properly, classmates who are...argh okie.. i'm whining again. shouldnt be complaining anyways. shouldnt be blaming others. i was the one who failed. i took the paper 2years ago and the reason i got into ite in the first place. but its heartbreaking to fail by just a grade for not once but 2 times. heh. anyways When i told my mum she wasnt even bit surprised or displeased. she just smiled and said "dah lar ko pi dudek jek pat ite. make sure ko belajar . " u know wat? i love my mum.

Now though i feel like going to the beach and set my thoughts to relax mode. cause at the moment my mind is filled with stuff. you know... stuff. try imagine and extract painting. imagine it moving. thats wats going on inside there. its just blurry images of shit . urgh madz need something to clear my mind. anybody have a ciggie???

blergh fucking o level results made me so fucked up... why do they tease me eveyytime.. 5 marks or so from a pass man... fuck those english bastards... now i know how valuable a mark is.. anyways to those who did well.. congrats...

underedge- without you

another wish ungranted
you open your doors and i fell through
why do i keep deluding?
memories that has never been true

but i know youll be right there failing
when i need u the most.
but i miss you so.
faces fading as i quickly lose control


today went well i guess. spent time with hilmi, rafi and adi cause fir was doing some open house thingy. Interesting people they are. makes me wonder why i dun hang out with them that much. ouh well they Kind of remind me of the project playkids. in a way that smoke usually covers the area that we sit in and girls would be the usual topic of conversation. anywaysfinally gonna get the rock band back on track. zack and yazid has already agreed. im completely stoked by it. I have been wanting to do this band for quite a while now. As long as i get to play incubus i'm happy. all we need is a vox though. anyone interested?

yesterday was history

tomorrow is a mystery

today is a gift

and i'm glad i spent it with you

got so sick of my band that i decided to remove their faces from my blog. and replace them with mine. heh. theres no better love than loving one's self

sessioning was great. Have one new song but the progression has not been completed. Shall try and work out something. Had fun with dan,zack, allen and din when they came to 'session'. Chilled underneath my block untill 9.30 pm. imagine my embarassment when my mother started shouting my name from the my flat. and yeah my flat is the top floor so cyou can probably imagine how loud my mother was. got another lecture from mum after dat got pissed off. i mean. in all seriusness, i was underneath the block the whole time. If i was somewhere else i would have understood if mum had been angry. sheesh besides the fact i'm 18 already. i still feel as though she treats me like some 12 year old. i bet 12 year old kids have more freedom den me. blergh. anyways i love my friends a lot...!!

waiting for dan and zack to come. Gonna create some new tunes hopefully cause we really need some new material. Its frustrating that after coming up with a melody and some tunes on my head it all dissappears whenever i pick up my guitar to write it all down. urgh FruSSSSt. i shall go beat up my pillow now.. byebye..

Underedge is fucking finished!!!

urh sensitivity towards other people around you. That is one really important issue. Guess i shall be careful with what i write on my blog. I just realised that there are people who actually read it. should introduce a counter somewhere here.

anyways my attendance for skool is really bad, got called into the officecause most of my modules are below 95% which is not a good thing. Shall plan out when i'm gonna cabut to save for rainy days.

feedback for my star has been really good. I'm really happy.smiling in fact. so i guess that means we are gonna go record our ep. i'm possibly aiming for 8 songs. dunch know if we gonna use fake drums or the real thing. shall confirm with dan

blergh im tired and gonna sleep .bye.



ada apa dgn cinta??

i suddenly feel like everybody's ignoring me.. shall investigate

hello guys... listening to the dumb star song that we finished recording.. if u guys wanna listen go to dan or zura's blog and try to download from there. yesterdays gig with first chapter was urh depressing larz... made hell lot of mistakes but people there told me "huh? wat mistakes?? u guys did great!!" haha yea rite.. played songs which we shouldnt play and i hell i played stuff that it shouldnt have and left out stuff that i should have blergh... anyways... if u guys want pictures.. go wan's blog.. i'm lazy to post up.. cause i look like a fucked up faggot.. weeeeee

anyways didnt get to see 180 and never too late cause the kids wanted to go laselle.. so project playground said goodbye to the first chapter and marina promenade and headed there.... shah was there too thx dude for coming to see us... . i owe him a lot man... first he payed for the plain sunset gig den he payed for my entry into laselle.. i love him so much.. must find more friends like him. (adds to wishlist)* anyways sour grapes was awesome... and idiot asshole tried to make a fool of himself by dancing or sumthing... which was not fucking funny... idiot.. fucker... so seven sundays went on... it was kinda boring urh their set.... but i love the effects their guitarists used.. reminds me of oasis.. wat ever happened to that band??? ok den gorbachev went on... and they were awesome.. really awesome... especially the bassist... ok den my precious went up... this was the band and the reason i followed shahrul to laselle in the first place.... they were good but not the type of music i like... too much screaming... den the cops came for wat reason i donno and stopped the gig... i assume it was because of some fights... anyhows... was pissed so me fir and shah went off in search of food and had our dinner at kfc only to find out that refunds were being given out so after finishing our food... we rushed back. my shoulders almost gave way cause i was carrying my damn guitar around since early this morning... and rushing up the overhead bridge doesnt help.. so didnt get our refund cause the money had already been locked up. instead the lady asked us to drop by in a week to collect it. not sure when. so we dragged ourself out and walked towards the bus stop. i dint bother to go and meet the guys cause i was too tired. so took the bus with fir and talked about how our gig went. and reached my grandma's home at 11.

today went to work which was fun. did bumper boat with dhai and pei shi. there were both fun to work with. pei shi was fun talking to and dhai well hes a psychopath. shall not say anymore cause im tired and i wanna rest so goodnights...

Everyday when you return from your school, whether or not it is from a secondary school, a junior collage, a polytechnic, or ITE, you would probably think that school sucks.
All that work and torture under your lecturer's or teacher's homework or assignments, or tutorials...
But think about this, i mean really think. All the time spent with your classmates, all the laughter, sorrows, and happiness of knowing that your friends are there in your class.
Now imagine them gone, perhaps part of them or even all of them. You may not realise it, but when advancing into the next level of education, it is inevitable that some friends will be parting with you.
What is all this you ask yourself, what I ask is of you to think, for those who received this mail, what do those people who were once or were still your classmates and friends meant to you.
Anyone who has at least finished their o levels and has graduated from respective schools would know the feeling of parting with your classmates and friends.
Not knowing when you still see them again.
Perhaps the next day, the next week, month, years, or even decade. Perhaps one day, you would realised how bitter sweet those memories were, the fun you had with your classmates and friends.
That is why ever so often when you asked someone which is the most fond memories they had in their years in education, they would often have that sadness in their eyes, but yet, they smile briefly.
It's the memories of their school friends. Those unforgettable years of laughter and happiness in school.
Each classmate had suffered under the same stresses in school. The teachers, whether they are kind or extremely strict.
So treasure your schooling days, don't complain, because you never know when you will miss them dearly. And perhaps, shed a tear for those treasured times in your youth.

i fucking cried reading this.... finally somebody gave me something worth reading for...

gig is in 3 hours time and its strange that i'm feeling as though i'm gonna go to a normal jamming session. quite a change from the unsleepable night i had before underedge's gig... my parents are in pahang.. visiting a relative and my sis is at my grandma's so i ahve the whole house to my own. i should be practicing but as in all cases.. last min work never pays off.. so im sitting down in front of the com listening to plain sunset.. yet again... they seem more listenable since they broke up. Dont know why..... my baby is back where she belongs and she looks awesome on my guitar stand. and i hope she doesnt break on me again. anyways back to first chapter. were gonna be playing 4 songs and we are first band so please do come early today. its only appopriate that first chapter is having their first gig and also playing first band. by the next gig i tink were gonna change our name to sec chapter. yeah dudes.!!! okie kids gonna go off and meet the guys for some breakfast... byebye

playing plain sunset - plain sunset on my guitar and i'm thinking.......... i thought had i put it all behind and i tot that i could walk away but every single thing u said has sticked around inside my head . im sure u dunt remember about the things u used to tell me and the things u used to do and u used to say. but now that its over i need to hear from you to find the strength to carry on. wish there was something more that i could say but all i know now is dat i miss you. i wish you would miss me too. you make me cry every time i tink of you. And you know dat i love you. but so long........ u know we couldn't save it . theres no need for you to tell me dat your sorry. do u remember how we stood and watched the sun together?? ill treasure those memories.. memories of our plainsunset...

today was fun.. guess meeting your closest friends and talking cock was wat i needed after a few depressing days.. went only to visual basic class today and spent time surfing the net comparing the metal zone with other distortion gadgets... i'm contemplating selling my mt-2 gadjet cause i want a much cleaner sounding pedal. days of 'the more distortion the better' are over.. so pondering over the proco rat and tubescreamer. which one should i get huh?? somebody help me k... hmmz dillemma... o well recording is finished except the back up vocals which we will do some other time when zura is free again... she sang wonderfully..... awesome even... spectacular... like ili said the english version of cokelat... ahah... but i felt a ting of guiltyness when she left though.. i mean she came all the way here to sing for our pathetic demo and she went home alone... the least we could do was sent her to the bus stop or sumthing.... sheesh wat friends are we yea?? ANYWAYS THANK YOU VERY much for joing the band... u raWKk!!!

2morrow gonna fetch my baby from swee lee.. den gonna get myself a mesh cap and maybe dat adidas jacket ... and den session with the chaps for the gig on saturday... weeeeeeee go visit the original emokids------------------> they rock!!

its not nice too see two close friends fight.. its really not nice... heartbreaking even. some of us really must know when to stop. hope everything will go well tomorrow. wat a fucked up week

nieways im sick of people saying in their msn nick... 'why do you guys talk behind my back... if not happy say it to my face' and all this crap... this are the same people who will quiver when confronted... the first to cry when their backs are against the wall.. so face it eh.. u people prefer hearing it from other people... mudderfuggers .... be honest for once willl ya

continuation of a fucked up day filled with problems.. added with shah's den iskandar's.. blergh... sometimes people's problems are the ones that affect me the most... not my own.... i feel as though my life is too problem free that i go around finding shit to make me depress. sticking my nose into other peoples business so i can spend time actually thinking and appreciating that i dun have to go through all this crap. this relationship problems this peer problems. this family problems. haiz all together kids "MADNESS"

.... this has been stupid nonsensical entry..

your no jesus your no elvis your not the answer to my problems... fuck offf....

fuck being happy

u know wat fuck singapore. fuck singapore for being a country where only grades count. i dun wanna live in a nine to five life. i wanna enjoy my life while i still can. life is too fucking short to slob away with assigments and tutorials and projects and shit . fuck dat man.
whine motherfucker whine

i jus tot of something interesting... when we were in sec 3 we kids made sort of like an amazing race to see who would get attached first.. i mean me,dan,allen,din,mus,is,zack,rashid, has all never been attached before at that point of time... so it was interesting to see who would first... dat was 2years ago now....sad to say i'm still last... well joint last with mus.. haha dude u rock!!!.. . first on the finishing line though was is, den dan got attached, den zack, allen and rashid. den after skool ended din got attached and recently alif. they have all went through failed relationships and also find new ones. my friends are getting attached and reattached except me. which is a FUCKING achievement... haha so i guess i'm the one who won this stupid amazing race after all.. eh wait a min.. yeah mus.. join me on the podium yeah??

apologises to readers for crappy entry

read din's blog and there is an almost identical entry about being sensitive and shit.. heh thats nice

vibes At Marina Promenade Saturday, 21 February 2004 3pm till late Price - Free



Bands:
Rushed
Rough Cast
Y2K
First Chapter
A Subtle Revenge
Never 2 Late
One Eighty
Mistaken Identity
Generation 69

weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

ish time for a whining session.

well most of my classmates probably know me as the fun gayish bastard that they can always make fun of and ahve a good laugh at.. and this persona has stucked till now... and its getting kinda old... obviously none of them can tell when i'm in a good mood and not.. and dat sucks when they keep baragging me with shit and at the same time blatantly ignoring my cries for help cause they tink here i am trying to irritate them again.. well fuck dat shit urh... and yea another thing i found out about myself is i guess i'm a very sensitive person... exp.. i walk by a group of girls and they burst out in laughter.. i immediately tink they are laughing at me... i enter a bus sit down beside an old apek. he puts his hand to his nose.. and i immediately think i smell bad... walk past a park with a pondok full of mats and they start cursing and laughing.. i immediately think its about... well i tink everything is about me... u all might call it shiok sendiriness but hell its probably about my insecurity with the way i am. yes i am fucking insecure and it really doesn't help that i wake up everyday and stare at the mirror on the end of my bed. hurh need help !!

"hello prepaid hotline??"

listening to the recenlty recorded version of my star.... and yeah the metal zone effect.... the guitars sounded terrible.. especially mine... well den again ONly mine sounded horrible.. zack used his zoom and buit in amplifier distortion so it did sound better than mine ... urh i'm so gonna throw away my metal zone.... urh.. anybody wanna buy??? blergh... and yeah no offenct to rashid.. the bass sounded horrible too... well the plug straight into amp effect.... haha but wat the hell for an amateur home recording it sounded pretty nice and okie... o well last few days went well.. saturday's jamming with first chapter was great fun , i mean jamming with the chaps has been always fun... but there was something special about yesterdays plus the heartbreak of my dear epiphone's bridge getting broken .. practically gave way when wan was tuning my guitar... haiz ... anyways was surprised to see zura turn up.. tot she had skool.. but all the more better that she could come... she is singing 'one' song called fallen with pride for us.. and let me repeat yes 'ONE SONG'! KHUS and TWEET remember that!!! she is underedge property oki?? hahahahha........

work was a bitch... shall not talk about it... gonna be a bz week.. gonna go swee lee and ask them to replace the bridge... i know i could do it myself but heck its a brand new guitar that i bought.. and its already giving me problems so yeah better fucking fix it... den of course friday is re-recording... saturday is gig and yeah sunday working again... weeepop

sessioning by the bay was hellot of fun... session with the ska bangers first while waiting for tweety and azura to arrive.. and yeah we completed the winning eleven song with horns and all.. really cool.. u guys rock... den zura came and tweety came with shain... that rockstar from msc... heh so recapped all the songs... guess im pretty prepared for it and im singing one song!! yey!!!! haha shall not reveal wat song though... den we played the winning eleven song again.. and practically made a nuisance of ourselves, luckily the police were not called in... heh so got home and got lectured by my mum which was the only blip from an otherwise fun day...

finch-bury me


I'm sorry, but red's my color now
guess you got to me somehow

this mistake is breaking me
she said, she said
Just shut your mouth and take the blame
and paint your face with the shame
I know because I know

Take these eyes and bury me
so that I can't see your face
and when you die, I won't cry
I've been there before, flesh is warm

but I've grown cold
State your claim into my veins
and scrape my face into your hands
and bend me to the ground


Take these eyes and bury me
so that I can't see your face
and when you die, I won't cry



I can't justify your eyes, your eyes
justify your eyes, your eyes
justify your eyes
Take these eyes and bury me
so that I can't see your face
and when you die I can't cry


I can't cry
I can't cry
I can't cry
I can't cry
I can't cry

p.i.e lesson today set me thinking. Well basically we had to list out our personal weakness and make it into a strength.. and i listed down anti socialness as my weakness. After confiding in the lecturer she went up and told the whole class. Interestingly enough the strength about being anti-social and having just a small group of friends like i do, is dat it eliminates all those superficial people. 'friends' who u see everyday and say hi to but dun even know your name. Friends that you feel forced to say something to avoid getting called arrogant or something. Well thats plenty of those. Shall not name any, Another strength is that u tend to be very loyal to the small group of friends that you have. Thats true, really true. And thats the reason i'm always seen with dan,din,alip,zack,allen and now fir. Yeah dude. The guy whom i almost never fail to irritate everyday at skool. You rock. Anyways 2morrow session with 'the chapters' and re-recording my distortion parts. My sense of timing is way off and my guitar playing just sux. Hoping to go republic poly open house with dan and din in between. Their intentions is to enrol these june but mine is to just go there and look at someone. Hehe :P cheerios.

in networking class and i hate it. heh fucking hate it. o well recording for bintang ku is finished, juz left the vocals and mixing . Not gonna send it for mastering cause its juz one song that we plan to give gig organizers. And yeah on the 21st underedge might be playing too but on a diff venue to the one that first chapter is playing. Priorities though lie with first chapter cause its our first gig. And heck im really looking forward to it. so yeah we shall see on the 21st. Ok thats all ok go

got home early today..... needed some rest and i'm gonna go sleep now

haiz i miss plain sunset already.. i have only begin to start supporting them and they had to disband... so cruel.. the amazing thing is that i have only gone 2 two of their gigs prior to the epilogue but yet they have influenced me so much... JON!!! hahaha anyways the show was fucking emo.. i tell you goosebumps were all over my body when they played love songs for the emotionally wounded... a song i have never liked but yet when they played it live... i felt like crying... i mean seriusly crying... boohooo cry emo kid cry.... but yeah it was a very emotional night i can see it in the eyes of jon, sham and nizam... ronny was smiling all the way.. cool fella.. hehe.. o well... recording my star on tuesday... jus heard the rough demo of zura singing the song.. its sounds pretty never too late-ish.. but hahah hope it turns out under-edge-ish in the end.... HAHA OKIE CRAPPY!!!!!!!! anyways.. screw all of you who werent at the show!! hahahahaha juz kidding.. have a nice night...!! adios

so fucking love iris riot.... sweet november has been playing on my winamp for 1 one whole month now... so emotional man this kids... hehe anyways skool starts in 15 mins time.. gonna go out now.. and SO SORRY RAIHAN!! haiz... i'm so pathetic...

urgh in class right now and im totally frustrated with this visual basic asignment. I like have totally no idea what to do. Screw this shit.. heh somebody just burst in laughter.. (looks behind) .. ahahaha the kids are watching the william hung audition for american idol.. hahha She baNgs SHe Bangs... fucking hilarious...

went to skool got locked out went home slept played games updated blog made adjustments to band site blablalblalbalbalblalbla

hey dudes.. work was fun.. go paired up with michelle.. the cute and chubby girl.. talked a lot of crap with her, she had these cheeks which i wanted to cubit cubit.. wahrow so cute... haha so overall it was fun.. den met the guys who were having a session... we are after all forming a ska band.. hehha.. and im playing drums.. yey!!! all the members are learning new instruments.. dan is switching to guitar... zack is playing the clarinet... me drumming.. alif is trying the trumpet... so yea the usual suspects are getting together to play music... sure gonna be fun man... anyways im off to playstation land...

heres soem of the pix courtesy of apis.. love u baby...!!



ramlee on the bass


turtle on lead guitars


pi-ee on guitars and whining


tiger on drums


zura on vocals



ramlee and tiger



ramlee tiger and zura

fie2e owner of this ridiculous and unmeaningful blog. and yes he is smiling at you.. please smile back.. hahhaa

asthenia went well... i guessed... hahah have to see the video of our performance to see if it did go well.. but yeah the moment i stepped into the hall and heard cheap thrills playing.. i felt so fucking out of place man... all these power bands were playing... and we are like second rated shit.. sheesh so malu.. hehe anyways.. i'm so in love with no direction... they were awesome and have always been... love their new stuff as much as i love their old stuff.. and ss9... I HATE YOUR JOB!!! ehehahe nice nice.....



anyways if u guys do wonder.. we do have a website... its Your-e heh

just finished reading allens blog and i decided to write something... and heck its about the so called scenesters... the one who go to the gigs to just skank and mosh and bodysurf but fuck care abt the music... yeah them... the ones who go to gig and dress up to look cool.... and then go home and write on theier online blog about how they skanked and moshed and bodysurf but yet there was nothing about the bands... isn;t gigs about bands performing??? they only become happy when the ska bands come up.... sure i maybe a hypocrite in saying all this bcoz i too skank and mosh and do these stupid things... but i do sincerely care about the music... and this is my fucking blog so i am fucking happy to write about what i want and hey fucking poser lutfi.. u suck balls... from biker to skater to hip hopper to mat to PUNK?? screw you.. hhaha sheesh.. dun mind me i'm so full of crappiness...